A tale of a memorable Christmas

things going on my mind :
streess
work
things that happened
year end~

i did bad things I thought I'd never do.. how am I supposed to forgive myself?

I'm feeling the urge to blog again at this time, padahal I need to be in office at 5am!

first things first, my job. STRESSFUL! but i'm trying to cope, even if I get scolded, I tell meself "You learn! Never Give up!" but then again, tears do drop when you get lecturing over things you didn't do or things you cannot predict or things you don't dare to do or people you don't dare to offend. like how the crew always goes on breaks without the AD's permission. like how my damned talents would cancel on me last minute and I don't have replacements. I'm already feeling bad for have to ask all my friends to help me find talents. *sigh* even that didn't work. I even asked my talents... I feel like such a failure that I couldn't sort things out properly. *sighx100*

And then, my best colleague decided to resign leaving me suffering alone in office. I'm not saying I don't like working there, but things get really bad sometimes and I wonder if this line is me and if this is what I wanna become. But hey, I gotta take things as it comes.

Moving on, Christmas this year took a whole new turn...
I thought I was gonna be resting at home being boring and tired and all,
BUT
-I went partying in the midnite after work at 1am
-kissed a guy TWICE (he's got a gf)
-and clubbed with my bosses

Phew, talk about my nice girl image!
and then, talk about things I never thought I'd do!
Damn!
But it was the best Christmas ever! Thank you, Farid for everything!

My anak-anaks / interns will be leaving soon, I don't know how's life gonna be like without them.
They're like the crazy bunch that you can talk crap to, laugh like nobody's business,
and complain/listen to when there's some issue.

I'm so gonna miss them!
How to deal with the sadness?
First, my colleague, then my interns..
no, the other way around, the interns are leaving first...

For the first time and on christmas eve, I cried over being lectured,
it sucks because I have so much on my plate that I could barely catch a breath or take a rest,
honestly, I'm working even on christmas, luckily I'm not a christian, if not, I have no idea how to deal with going to church and all. but then again, I always put an upfront "I don't need a holiday" sort of attitude when it comes to working in front of my bosses, but deep down, I do want a rest. Which is why, I've got my passport done, and tickets booked to Hong Kong next year after I finish my project. I haven't had weekends in a long time... and this I think I deserve. I'm just waiting for one of my bosses to say yes to my leave application. Wish me luck!


until then, this is jOyCe signing out at 11.17pm, 25th December 2011(should be my last post for year 2011) I hope it ends well... :)