Lost

things going on my mind :
assignments
i feel empty today...

over the past week, i've been feeling damn empty, like there's a big hole in my stomach and all... i dunno, perhaps the feeling is because of something and someone... i don't even know what to write and what to think of... looking at pics posted by Erisha on Facebook, i suddenly see some1 else.. someone who looks like me but is totally someone else.. I've been feeling so clueless ever since thingts have changed, I'm so uncertain about so many things... plus the fact that i'm always indecisive... i feel, lost... the after effect of everything is pressing on my now and i feel it.. I want to talk, but talk's useless as things have already gone so deep... i feel that nothing can change the fact of everything that has happened... i should be living my life like I always wanted.. and I am, sorta... i wish the song I posted earlier could remind me to forget things...

The old me is dead and gone, dead and gone...

anyways... a little update from the past half a month +... so I've got my new timetable, sucks a bit, but i can live with that considering all of my friends were jealous of it.. my classes are until 1.30 the most on mondays, weds, and thursdays, its only tuesday that's until 6 bcoz' of the Moral subject, and TGIF, i'm free on Fridays... so basically until thursday afternoon, ppl from outstation can go back d.. imagine Ling Hui from Kampar has to go to classes on Saturdays for her Japanese lessons from 3-6... but anyways... besides loving my timetable, I also love the results that came out like 2 weeks back... it was lovely to still be in the dean's list.. despite the slip, I still managed to get 3.71, a slight fall from 3.825, but I can live with it.. as long as my Dean's List can be maintained, i'm alright, I believe if I paid more attention to studying... i could've maintained my results, but as a student of my age, I live life to the fullest, at least I hope.. haha... however, I have a feeling this sem i'm so going to flunk my grades... I have 5 subjects, Moral which i HATE, Mass Comm Theory which sounds and looks super hard based on past experiences explained by seniors, Advertising Copywriting which I'd think sound easy but assignments are tough, Multimedia Tools For Advertising which is basically graphic designing with Illustrator, Photoshop n Dreamweaver which would've been fun if it were not in this sem coz of the workload from the next subject, Broadcasting 2 which i love the lecturer, Mr. Beh(based on past experiences of helping him) but the assignment is damn demanding, it's all about ideas, pitching(Music Video pitching i mean), production, co-operation and a hell lot of outdoor shooting! which is fun if it's not an assignment... hell i have a lot of things to do.. i feel so dead at the end of the semester, no more going out so much now i guess.. we've made a promise to NOT PROCRASTINATE this time... and now that i'm in Year 2... we have 9/10 more new classmates from KTAR... one of them my ex-secondary classmate Seow Yin which now we have 2 and a half tutorial groups... i was surprised to not see Ageetha here coz' it used to be our promise to meet each other here in Y2... i feel so old and that time flies so fast that we're in Y2 now... but then again, i haven' seen any of the Y1S1 juniors yet.. at least i think... damn there are a lot of handsome guys juniors in Y1S1 Graphic Design course.. talking about GD, my friends in GD Y2S1 won some sort of drawing competition that got them first prize of RM8000, impressive and this time no joke.. hahaha... so anyways, kudos to them..

went for Adrian's birthday dinner @ Chilli's in Bagsar Shopping Center (BSC) on the last day of my holidays on 31st of May and boy we had a nite... supposed to be @ 7pm, so me being the me I am went early there in case of parking issues, i went a few rounds until i had a spot right in front of the parking entrance... thought it;d be great since I'm gonna be late home at nite... so went to the toilet to freshen-up myself den waited for him while i walked around, den waited for Darren n the girls, i was thinking of wearing the dress i wore for presentation, the high waist grey and black short dress, but thought there wasn't anything big so i wore a grey short casual dress which I bought during an outting with Thiv @ Forever 21, 1U... in the end, when they arrived, i feel a slight bit under-dressed.. haha... they were dressed up so nicely complete with make up, heels and all luckily i wore my heels as well... not having much time, i couldn't bother making up, or did i? I dun remember if i had put on make up that day, i don't think so.. only lippie.. so can you imagine how not prepared i was.. moreover, with the time-constrain, i was only able to put on lippie.. anyways... we had fun eating, I had monterey chicken which the mashed potatoes were awesome, and C and Darren's honey chicken chipotle was nice as well, den most of us had bottomless drinks and I had an extra some sort of mild alcoholic drink and treated the birthday boy to a presidente margarita which was pure alcohol and tasted nice... at least more alcoholic that mine... C ordered an extra dessert, Molten Lava, which was oh-so-yummy....... met with Adrian's friends, John Ling, Jon Ti and John Chong, and Xing(which was totally cute*blush* but taken), den we went to Bangkung, a park in Bangsar where they had a drunken session... hahaha... kinda, Adrian was like talking non-sense sort of mood and John Chong brought Tigers, Hoegaarden and Absolut Kurant, which smelt lovely but tasted like.. alcohol... hahaha... went home around 11 + coz Adrian has got a curfew, hahaha.. no.. coz' his mum is at home, alone... so he has to go back and accompany her.... the next day, i practically had no hangover but i wish i had coz' classes were @ 8... haha...

celebrated Rick's Birthday @ Shogun 1U coz' of their promotion thingy, filled myself until I was so done.. we sat there from 6 to 10.30pm, practically until the restaurant closed... the amount of food there has gone up a lot.. the last time i went there there was any additional soup and thai delights sort of things... i have no problems going there again, but not this time.. Ling Hui came back and skipped her classes to celebrate.. so on Thursday, after my and Xin Leng's class, we went to watch Monster VS Aliens which was awesome.. so funny!!! den we went walking around until about 6 den we took our que number and waited for around 10 mins for them to open and let us in.. it was so funny coz' the guys were late(can u imagine?) so 3 of us were sitting at a 12 persons table.. slowly the guys came and after a while more, Chun Hwa came with Jasmine and Li Xiang... in the middle, my GD friends took pix with their DSLR cam, me holdingan un-pro cam, went arounf camwhoring with my cam n them helping me take some... after eating till they closed, we went back to the guys' new home and ate cake.... den I sent myself home with Rick and Ling Hui in the car and she drove back to Section 17 to Rick's place and home later... today, Friday, I washed my baby and Ling Hui's car as well and den went up to my place to wached up and den picked up Rick to watch Nite @ the Museum for the second time... first was with CY... it was a funny show and i liked it and said "I don't mind watching for second time", and i really went for a second time... it was supposed to be lunch @ McD which turned into a shopping but then it became a movie date... hahaha.. wanted to go McD for lunch so i suggested 1U, parking and air-con wise... den we were like "let's go shopping" but Ling Hui was broke so i was like, "Movie?" and den she was like "OK!"... so LingHui bought tix and me n Rick went to McD to order food and all 1st... we were kinda rushing for the 2pm show.. so we had like less than 30 mins to eat, but we save a bit on drinks coz' we refilled at McD and tapau-ed into the cinema... den after the movie, we walked a bit and I bought a shoe on 50% in Nose and boy, I have yet to find a time to wear it... blue pointed toe with blingy-high-heels heels... damn nice and cheap i must say... den we went home coz' Ling Hui needed to clean her hamsters' cage... she was having a problem with her bf and i hope the best out of it... i sometimes feel jinxed coz' when i think that they(any couple that consists of friends I know) will NOT last, they'll last, until i think that they'll get married in the future, they'll break up, right when i think they'll last... this has happened more than once and i feel damn jinxed, but like what mum say, i can't control all these things... so do fret... :D anyways, Ling Hui said she won't be coming back anytime soon coz' of her saturday classes.. i'll miss her... and SeeSing is skipping a lot of classes...

anyways... on the last wednesday before my classes started, i went to collect my NOR(results slip) and went to 1U with CY... watched Nite @ the museum as said den went for lunch at... ermmm... where did we eat??? Little Taiwan.. so guess it wasn't much of a nice place that i can remember of... den we walked around until around late 4 o'clock, we bought pretzels and sat down for our tea-time, den instead of CY taking the public transport, i drove her home and went to my dad's on the way after sending CY to show him my results... had dinner there and went back home to pick my mum... :D

ps: i'm supposed to compose an english song... but i have yet to find the inspiration :D

until then, this is jOyCe signing out at 12.17am, 6th June 2009